Owlblink: New England, Je T'aime

In mid-July, I flew to the east coast to visit colleges and family. My infallibly patient aunt Margot drove me to Yale, Harvard and Brown (all of which I loved and are now at the top of my list) and yet somehow made sure I had the time to kayak in the Atlantic Ocean with my cousin Christopher, hang out with my cousin Meredith and her awesome girlfriend Jess, go to a Red Sox game, and have a series of increasingly hilarious conversations with my uncle Bubba.

While at the beach house, I was treated to a thorough history of the neighborhood dating back to its origin as a whaling town. Bubba then went on to describe the whaling process in detail (a fascinating subject - read further) and expressed with surprise and no small amount of smugness that the house we were in was one of the few houses not to have been destroyed by hurricanes at some point during the 20th century.

Seizing my opportunity, I scoffed and replied demurely: "Oh Bob, there's no way you get hurricanes in Massachusetts. It's much too far north."

B: Don't get hurricanes? I beg your pardon, of course we do!
G: Ha! All the way up here? Who told you that?

At this, Bubba frowned and stumped over to the bookshelf, returning with a large manilla folder full of news clippings, pictures, and web articles, and laying it in front of me, spread his evidence across the table. Meredith and my aunt looked over, giggling.

B: Au contraire! We actually had a sizeable hurricane not too long ago, as you can see in this article.
G: Oh Bob. You know what they're doing, they're just trying to scare you so you'll buy their stuff. I bet he's employed by a contracting agency that builds foundations for old houses - it's just fearmongering. [Meredith and Margot giggled again]
B: Not at all! This author is actually an expert on the subject.
G: Bob, you know they just buy experts nowadays. Don't believe their corporate lies! There definitely aren't any hurricanes here.
B: Here, see for yourself. These pictures are from the most recent hurricane, and here are the ones before that. All those houses over there were rebuilt after the hurricane destroyed them.
G: That's definitely photoshopped. Yeah, those pictures are totally fake.
B: Photo shop? Like, they did them on the computer? No, in fact you can see the houses out the window. See the ones that look newer?
G: You know they probably just refurbish a couple houses in the neighborhood to get gullible homeowners to buy property insurance or new foundations. It's just a big scam - you don't get hurricanes here, no way. Definitely no hurricanes. Not here.
B: I just...you are incorrect, mister.

At this point Margot was leaning on the counter and Meredith was doubled over, gasping and howling. Bubba looked over, and then back to me, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

B: Hmph. Anybody can see the evidence, I...
G: Whatever Bob. You can believe this scam if you want to.

Owlblink.

At dinner, Bubba was decidedly cranky. After a number of lighthearted jabs in my direction, Meredith sighed and said, "Bubba, you know he was joking. We all believe you.

G: I don't know, Bob. Everybody knows you don't get hurricanes up here. It's just...everybody knows it!
B: I'm not...I don't like it when people put things over me. Like you, mister.
M: He's just teasing you, Bubba. It's ok.
B: Hmph.

Man, I want to go to school here. Here's to family, right?

Christopher, Me, Meredith